// insert blog title here

2007-08-29T00:35:00.000+05:30

Macbeth on acid.

M: Saw you the weird sisters?

B: No, my lord. The earth hath bubbles as the water has and these are of them. Whither are they vanish'd?

M: Into thin air. What seemed corporal, melted like breath into the wind. Would they had stay'd.

B: Were such things here as we do speak about? Or have you eaten the insane root that takes the reason prisoner?

I art thankful to my college for having included Macbeth in the syllabus - Having not watched any other film adaptation, Macbeth 2006 was a very rewarding experience.

Director Geoffrey Wright(Romper Stomper) sets Shakespeare's Macbeth in the Melbourne underworld.
King Duncan is the bossman druglord.
Gun toting metrosexual gangster Macbeth drives an Aston Martin and wears designer suits. At home he's got a Bose Radio CD, he watches his murder spree splashed all over the 6'oclock news on a Plasma TV..even has an iPod dock.
And a hawt Lady Macbeth snorts coke.

Sweet huh? Yes, almost. Well, here's the thing. It's not as cool as it could have been, but it's still worth a watch. Even though you know the plot, much fun is had when scenes turn out a lot cooler than you imagined.
I know I know, its all going to sound weird at first but it''ll be fine after you get past a hoodlum utter a line like "say to my father the knowledge of the broil as thou didst leave it".

The ebook would sure come in handy although the dialogue is not entirely incomprehensible. Much of the dialogues have been snipped or tweaked a bit to suit the screenplay.
Some characters and scenes are missing too..like there's no Donaldbain, no porter but all that don't take away much from the movie. Gangmembers speaking Shakespearean english for more than 2 sentences continuously ought to be majorly campy, right? Right. However, despite weak performances by some of the cast, overall it is somewhat balanced by the powerful script and mad visuals. The soliloquies are there and they work. So do the kinky witches, Lady Macbeth, Duncan's murder and the ghost of Banquo. The slo-mo gun battle in the ending is lame but the actual ending is a nice touch.

It would be foolish to judge this film using unscientific iMDB ratings for we do have a winner here folks. The film features very good(sometimes over the top) production values, sharp editing, brutal violence & gratuitous nudity. Helps much if you're stoned. Ok seriously, trust me, this is a very creative valiant effort and there's parts of it that are good enough for repeated viewings. Radiohead's music and capable A-list actors would've done wonders with this script.

Shakespearean purists are going to be pissed - This movie is not for them so nobody giveth a rat's posterior about what they think.

2007-08-08T04:01:00.000+05:30

Patent infringement lawsuits.

An unknown company SP Technologies is suing Apple and iPhone claiming to own the patent for the touchscreen keyboard. If they win, the already inferior iPhone interface will be imissing an ikeyboard.

Another noname Aloft is suing both Adobe and MS over patents for Network Browser Graphical User Interface for Managing Web Content.

Sharp sues Samsung for LCD patent infringement.

and here's a good one
Yesterday, Alcatel-Lucent's 1.5billion dollar suit against MS was thrown out. Had the verdict been in favor of Alcatel-Lucent, it wouldn't be long before they decide to sue every other product in the market using the MP3 codec.

(via /.)

2007-08-02T01:08:00.000+05:30

Dear Sanjay Dutt & Mohamed Haneef

One or more sick individuals killed a lot of men and women.
If you knew who did it or had prior knowledge of what your buddies were upto but you did not report their ass to the police and people had to and continue to die because YOU wouldn't rat out your friends, you rightly deserve to go to jail, or die.

2007-07-11T20:46:00.000+05:30

PlayStation 2 print ads for India(June 2007)

How inconsiderate of the miniscule female gaming population in India.
A part of your target demographic may be amused but given a choice between an hour of PS2 or spooning, most guys pick the latter, almost everytime. You lose, Sony. There are hardcore PS2 gamers with sexy intelligent girlfriends.

PlayStation 2
-Because your girlfriend bores you shitless

is like saying

Old Monk Rum
-Because your wife left you for another woman

It's not too late. You can fix this. Release another set of ads where a guy bores the girl, shitless, with talk of cricket, bikes etc..
Come on Sony, play nice, now!

2007-07-01T05:41:00.000+05:30

Die Hard 4.0

I say fuck all the other sequels that hit the screens in 2007.
Die Hard 4 is the real deal. It's everything a Die Hard film should be and more.

First off, the movie you see in theatres is modified for a PG-13 rating unlike the earlier R-rated parts 1,2 & 3. The die hard DIE HARD fans are disappointed that the violence isn't bloody enough and the language, quite tame. There's definitely an unrated version around somewhere that will probably release as a special edition DVD.
That said, the script is not watered down for kids. Things keep blowing up and bodies are piling up all the time. This has to be the most violent PG-13 movie ever.

Bruce Willis, at 52, is the man. John McClane is way cooler than any spiderkid or pirate.

The action sequences- brilliant ! I wouldn't be wrong if I say the thrills are right up there with Terminator 2. There's two scenes that reminded me of Lost World and True Lies but I'll let that go because the rest of the movie is soo fuckin awesome.

If you watched any Discovery channel specials on Cyber Terrorism you know the entire plot already. The opening credits say
"Based on the article A Farewell to Arms by John Carlin". Don't expect the script to match the quality of the article but its not dumb either. I couldn't find any technical plotholes. In my medical opinion, every hacking related scene in the movie is plausible.

It's amazing how they stay true to the 19 year old Die Hard formula and still deliver a kickass movie in 2007.

John McLane+sidekick are pushed to the brink while taking on badass terrorist and henchmen amidst tons of explosions.

This is exactly how you make a sequel.

Die Hard 4.0 is highly reccommended for the
-Bruce Willis fan
-Die Hard series fan
-Action movie fan
-Geeks/Dystopian future/disaster movie fan
-Just about anyone in the mood for some good ol Hollywood style explosions and chases

A hugely satisfying genuine summer blockbuster.
Die Hard remains one of the best action franchises of all time.

1408

Okay movie. Could've been much much more but its still pretty okay as it is.
Still miles ahead of all the gore/torture porn that is being passed off as horror.
Very watchable. Watch with friends. Argue over the ending. over a bottle of whisky. whatever floats your boat.
I'm going to bed.

2007-06-16T13:53:00.000+05:30

"Dei... Can't take it anymore! pesama 1000rupees black la ticket vaangidalaama??"
"No machaan. Approm 2 hours queue la ninnu ticket vaanginathukku artham illama poidum."
-June 15th, After NDTV,IBN footage and firstdayfirstshow reviews all over the internets.

"As long as they are decent don't do anything. But even if one person tries to start a galatta, hit them mercilessly."
-June 14th, Senior Inspector person announcing loudly in Kannada to constables on duty during Sivaji advance booking.

Review coming soon. Die haters!

Update:

This Sivaji review is long due. :) Was too busy slacking..

The purpose of a good review is to help you answer the question of whether you should watch the movie or not. I'll cut right to the chase. I'm going to explain this graphically with the help of visual aids in order to enable you to make a wise and informed decision.
What you see below are the US and UK box office reports for the weekend of jun 15. It's pretty self explanatory.

A Fantastic four sequel?? Really? The first one sucked so bad.. what made them think we wanted more???

Ocean's thirteen
Pirates of the Caribbean
Hostel Part II
Spiderman3

The people that like any of the above movies automatically forfeit the right to complain about story, screenplay or plotholes in Sivaji. You're going to believe that a man who gets bitten by a radioactive spider can shoot webs from his hands and swing around tall buildings but not the swoosh swoosh sound when Rajini says punch dialogue?
Why the double standard? One will do just fine thank you.

Mr.Brooks has Kevin Costner in it.
Nancy Drew? Nah. Rent it.
Surf's up is another animated film about.. Penguins. Haven't we had enough already?

I'll watch anything in the Shrek universe.
Knocked up is funny but its rated R, for a good reason. Not exactly a date movie or family movie.

Vacancy suffers from the same problem as Sivaji. A good first half and build up but the final act fails to please. Luke Wilson can act and does an okay job but hey why are we comparing Luke to the Rajini?

Anyways, the other movies on the chart are, for reasons beyond the scope of this review, um, just avoidable.

So there you have it. Sivaji emerges as the movie of the week and the undisputable winner in the US & the UK charts.

What was that? You're in India? Just shut up and bow down to the greatness of Rajini. All your base are belong to Sivaji.

Okay seriously, this is neither Rajini's best nor Shankar's. The movie is a teensy bit over the top but kinda delivers to its fanbase. There's good stuff that strays away from standard Rajini formula trying to set it apart and there's ham, cheese and corn bringing down the film to extremely mediocre levels. The villain doesn't give you chills. The script is a tad stale.
I guess you can forgive all that as an off day at the Shankar and Rajini kitchen since you had a great evening at the restaurant and thats what counts.

Sivaji - Worth your time if you're interested in Rajini or Tamil cinema in general. Others, I'm not too sure.

2007-04-14T19:49:00.000+05:30

Reasons why 2007 will be remembered among the coolest years of the 21st century

May

July

October

2007-03-24T00:45:00.000+05:30

Sivaji MP3 leak.

192kbps ! Yay ! Thalaivaaaaaaaaaaaa...

But wonly threee songs, okay?

And no reason to get violently happy. Why because? I must warn you that these are not verry Rajini-esque songs however, word is these are just scratch pieces made for shooting. So I guess its okay to not like them.
The final version to be released on April 4th should sound different or so we're told.

Review here http://itwofs.com/milliblog/2007/03/21/sivaji-tamil-a-r-rahman-sneak-preview/

Download here :)

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Sahara - Udit Narayan, Madhusree
http://www.tripleredx.com/share/751621

Vaa Ji Sivaji - Hariharan, Sadhana Sargam
http://www.tripleredx.com/share/398890

Oru Koodai Sunlight - Rahman, Blaze, Tanvi
http://www.tripleredx.com/share/795799

Has to be my favorite track - Awesome musical arrangements featuring intelligible lyrics like

[Lil Jon style male vocal and some serious bouncin looping crunk beats]

Oru koodai sunlight,
oru koodai moonlight,
ondraaga serndha,
color thaane en white!
eppodhum pachai tamizhan
ippo naan vellai tamizhan

(Dai.. what it ees? Ad jingle for fair and lovely?)

some more amazing lyrics
[sexy female vocal pichi odharifying tamil and español]

Hey oh hey oh, maestro del vito!
hey oh hey oh, maestro futuro..
and more spanish, onnum puriyala. Followed by,

hero hero, heeradhi hero
star-o star-o, nee superstar-O

Adhu seri.
This better not be Rajini's intro song.

Can't wait for April 4th.
Thank you internet.

Update:

Full album in 320kbps here. (Thanks to தமிழ்napster.)
Songs are largely similar to the leaked versions with some additional mixing.

Rajini's intro song is by SPB. Hah. Shankar wouldn't dare risk anyone else.
Rahman has used all styles ranging from MJ's beat samples to Gangsta Rap to his own trademark ballads. Full marks to ARR.
With the exception the brilliant Sahara, the entire album features childish, cheesy, over-the-top lyrics but its all fun and well-produced.

Sega fighter Sivaji right aa
Sachin adicha sixer, Sivaji adicha puncture(??)
Powerranger Jetix thaan da
Pathu veralum gimmicks thaan da
Payum vegam Jet Li thaan da.
Punch vecha idli thaan da...

Buying the CD from your nearest music store entitles you to a free Sivaji sticker and a Baasha VCD.

2007-03-14T01:52:00.000+05:30

Nosegrind.

Christian Slater's Gleaming the Cube played on Star Movies when we got cable TV for the very first time. As a gangly pimply immature boy(as opposed to the sexy stud now), most of the StarMovies movies got to me - especially this one since it packed some mean skateboarding stunts which inspired me enough to get myself a skateboard. I must've spent atleast two hours of productive time with my skateboard everyday after school, however, the lack of a halfpipe in Madras was the big downer guilty of snipping my skills in the bud. The falls while learning to ride a bicycle, unsupervised, without training wheels strongly hint that I would've broken twice as many bones and chickened out but its just that I was never given the option to find out. Oh, it pains me to this very day that I was denied the opportunity to be India's first Professional Skateboarder.

So nevermind that after skating for many years, the coolest stunt I could pull was a wheelie. What do I care what you think? Senior citizens and little girls in frocks thought it was clever.
Moving on, I stopped skateboarding sometime in the 9th standard. I had to act all grown up and extracurricular activities like playing with the apartment kids instead of studying for my boardexams were frowned upon by folks at home. Eventually, I lost touch and have no idea where my skateboard is now. I guess that kinda ended my career option as an extreme games sportsperson.

But today much joy comes when I play skateboarding games especially the series that feature Tony Hawk. He's this star Pro Skateboarder from ESPN's X-Games who inspired me to own/steal his games - Tony Hawk's Pro Skating 4 (THPS4) and Tony Hawk's Underground 2 (THUG2).
They're awesome skating simulator games which allow you to perform insane skateboard tricks in various environments and have a huge amount of replay value.

Anyway, so I was googling for info on whether the latest Tony Hawk's Project 8(THP8) was out for PC yet and one of the search results was

http://www.tony-hawks.com/home.php

This is the official website of a British writer/comedian called Tony Hawks who is often confused with Tony Hawk.
Apparently he receives in his inbox, a lot of fanmail from the fans of the skateboarder 'congratulating him on his skateboarding prowess and asking him advice on how to do various
manoeuvres'. And what does he do?
He replies to them.

Dear Tony,
you are my favourite skater.I went to the huckjam.It was great.I like you so much that at the huckjam I wanted to run down the stares and meat you.From Jason.
Jason, I don't let anybody 'meat me' anymore. The last time was too painful. Also, you should know that it is dangerous to 'run down the stares.' If people are staring, just let them. They'll get bored eventually and it's not big or clever to run them down.
TH

Tony i am your number one fan.Pleas give me some good advice about skateboarding and tips to.You are very professional about skateboarding.okey thats all bye.
I’m afraid you are rather presumptious to claim to be my number one fan. I’m afraid you have dropped three places this week to number 247.
TH

hey tony!
I like tony hawks underground.I skate myself and i must say i cannot ollie.How is it done?Cheers for reading. Samuel
Samuel, I like the way you finish your mail. 'Cheers for Reading'. At last someone else who appreciates this much maligned town. Reading is a wonderful place with an excellent one way system, efficient libraries, and a number of fine grass verges. On top of that, it is well-served by the M4 motorway, so it has easy access to places which are much, much nicer. Goodbye
TH

Hey Tony,
I just wanted to say you and your son were awesome today at the Tony Hawks boom boom huck jam! Good luck to you and your son by the way, I hope your son grows up to be pro like you!You better watch your son cause all the girls might go for him he is a cutie but too young for me!!!
Always Jessy 14 years old!
PS- I've always been a big fan to you and always will cause I wish I was as good as you!!! Is a flip a good board to start out with?
Dear Always Jessy,
Good name, and so much better than 'All ways Jessy' which has unsavoury connotations. Thanks you for the kind words about me and my son. I have to confess I was unaware that I had any male offspring, but there you go - you learn something every day. Look forward to meeting you at the next 'Tony Hawks Boom Boom Huck Jam'. These are proving very popular and they are a lot of fun to host. I'm particularly pleased to see that this time around home made marmalade sales were up on last year's event.
TH

More here http://www.tony-hawks.com/skatemail_archive.php

Tony Hawk's Project 8 is currently available for the XBOX and Playstation and should be out for the PC very soon.

2007-03-01T00:06:00.000+05:30

Testing new blogger. Can everyone see the image and all this text?

2007-02-20T01:01:00.000+05:30

Anathema.

There are things that make me want to cry foul... like No Smoking signs or some of the movies on this list.

Babel(Nominated for Best Picture, Best Editing, Music Score, Writing[Original Screenplay])
Pretentious horseshit that doesn't deserve any of the praise its getting. Every frame is heavily loaded with the kind of predictable gimmicks a lame horror movie would have - just that here we have weepy emotional situations jumping at us, "don't open that door..Noo!" cut to close up of mumbling mentally retarded siamese twins in a wheelchair.
This non linear, interlinking of plots, timeline all jumbled up style of filmmaking worked like a charm in Amorres Perros and 21 grams for this director-writer combo. But repeating the same technique again is just pushing it too far man. Thats just signs of the creative well drying up. Oh just banish them from Hollywood before they come up with another travesty.
Moving on, the lesser said about the music the better. Stringed instrument going "twaaangggg!... twaaaanggg!" amidst all the depression is highly annoying!
Best Editing?? You've got to be kidding !
Original?Screenplay.Bullshit. Unbelievably disgusting poseur flick for emo kids/adults.

The Departed(Directing, Editing, Best Picture, Writing[Adapted Screenplay])
All due respect to Martin Scorcese and all but IMHO, remakes should not be considered for best picture. It's unfair to the other candidates on many levels. You see, when you prepare to remake a critically acclaimed foreign language movie, you're already armed with the opinions of the most competent test screening audience ever. Now the remaking process is like writing an open book exam for which you got the question paper a year back. You know exactly what the viewers want, what they didn't like, what to sex up and the parts that need to be snipped.

Little Miss Sunshine(Best Picture, Actor in a Supporting Role - Alan Arkin(the grandpa))
Here's what. Just because you have a dysfunctional family(wow thats original), with Steve Carell supposedly playing a gay suicidal #1 Proust scholar and a teenager into Nietzsche it does not become an intelligent dark comedy. Whats laughable is that this turkey gets a Best Picture nod.
Its an average family movie, funny in parts. Everything is way too contrived. The movie parades around like a technically brilliant indie drama but when you attempt shoot down its plotholes and flaws, it hides in the comedy bunker. As if we forefeit the right to question logic since its masquerading as a comedy.
And the grandpa qualifies for a statuette for playing a profane kinky old man?? Please!! Greg Kinnear/Toni Collette should've been nominated, if any.

Fair reader, do you want to make the next indie movie thats going to sweep the 2008 academy awards? Here's what you need: A-list actors, poverty, controversial storyline(war, sexual orientation, religion, race), handicaps and some gratuitous sex thrown in for good measure.(gotta pander to old balding film critics, no? )

Anyway, I'd like to think I'm past the stage where I'm appalled at all the undeserving Oscar nominees while many talented filmmakers get snubbed.
Oh fuck you academy, foreign press and esteemed members of the jury.

Children of Men should've been nominated for Best Picture!!!!
Its easily one of the best movies I've ever seen. I'm serious. Okay.Stop snickering now..One day I'll staple office supplies to your faces.

PS: Even something like Crank(which really was pretty decent) is superior to Babel in all aspects and is by far a worthier contender for best picture.

2007-01-25T01:22:00.000+05:30

Pachaikili Muthucharam audio review.

Music: Harris Jayaraj

First listen - Ella paatum kaetta madri keedhu.. not a very good album, I say.
Second listen - Still.. engayo kaetta madri keedhu, paravailla.
Third listen - Mmmm, idhu nalla irukke.. an album that makes me work towards liking it.
Fourth.. - HJ back in form and how!

1. Unakkul Naan - Bombay Jayashree
Definitely not a nursery rhyme melody like "Paartha mudhal naale or Suttum vizhi sudare" for you to like it instantly. Sounds eerie at first but trust me, it gets way better with repeated listens. Bombay Jayashree's trademark brillance combined with HJ's lilting music and Thamarai's lyrics hit the song out of the ball park.

2. Unn Siripinil - Gauthami Rao, Robby
Ahh.. Just the song you were probably expecting out of the HJ stable. Nursery rhyme melody galore but slow and sexy nevertheless. I was just thinking.. this track would attain a whole new level if Shreya Goshal were to pep it up with some sighs and groans, but I digress. This is a good song.

3. Kadhal Konjam - Naresh Iyer
A "I'm so happy to be in love" song. Naresh Iyer is the man. Hummable and original tune but instruments remind you of New York Nagaram though. Harris needs to hook up with soundsamplesrahmanhasntusedyet.com pronto.

4. Unakkul Naan - Madhusree
Sadhna Sargam soundalike Madhusree recreates the magic of the first track in her own special way. I'd skip this one the first time around.

5. Karu Karu - Karthik, Naresh Iyer, Krish
This song rocks. Seriously, its like one of those power ballads with almost feminine crooning in between.

Verdict: Harris evolves. This is grown up music. Surely not epic but this set of sweet sounding clean film songs that provide a peek into Harris' musical genius will not disappoint - Definitely a must buy, if you're influenced by guys who express their opinion in pyjamas, sitting at messy desks with potato chips and beer.

Psst! Over here.

Click to download Pachaikili Muthucharam 320Kbps mp3 . (Thanks to தமிழ்Napsterdotcom. *Disclaimer*: I don't host any of the mp3s and I did not rip them. All credits and class action lawsuits go to the ones that did.)

2007-01-20T14:49:00.000+05:30

and then there was YouTube.

Sure, there's a lot of addictive user generated content but there's no denying that its the copyrighted footage thats getting them a huge chunk of the traffic.
Lawsuits and threats from content owners every other month, Youtube's gonna cost Google a lot more than $1.65billion.
Copyright infringement laws might just kill the Youtube star.

However, this is one lawsuit they didn't expect.

Youtube vs Utube

Universal Tube's website resides at www.utube.com, and it seems that plenty of wannabe YouTubers, fluent in text-speak, but less adept at typing out full words, are surfing their way over to the Universal Tube site by accident.

In the suit, Universal Tube alleges that its traffic has soared from around 1,500 hits in a month to over two million because of vast numbers of visitors looking for "lewd and other disgusting video".

This, the firm alleges, has caused confusion, cost it money, and caused lost sales.

Universal Tube's lawyer says that his company's site predates YouTube's by a decade or so, and says he is asking either for YouTube to find a new home for its site, or for the company to cough up cash to help his company establish a new corporate identity.

Yeah, right!

Now Universal Tube is using the extra traffic to their advantage by adding a search engine box with sponsored search results which look like YouTube's videos with ratings. So this is their new "corporate identity"?

Why would their customers want to deal with a company that sued YouTube on the basis of lost reputation but now has Shakira, webcam girls and gambling links on their homepage?

2007-01-06T22:44:00.000+05:30

A Scanner Darkly(2006).

A Scanner Darkly is not just another drug movie. Its more subtle than say, Requiem for a Dream. However, the characters and imagery are a drug trip in itself.

The film is animated by a revolutionary technique using a software called Rotoshop which I guess, basically allows GFX artists to sketch, paint and trace over video to make Winona Ryder look like this.

Post Production work took care of most of the sets, props and costumes. The actors didn't even need makeup. Cool eh? More films should be made this way, right? But Rotoshop is proprietary software thats not commercially available and the owners don't plan to give it away anytime soon.

This experimental movie is set in a future where drug addicts are hooked on to a deadly substance and undercover agents spy and infiltrate gangs but no sir, this is no matrix or anything you'd normally associate with scifi movies. Its not an edge of the seat thriller - on the contrary it's slow and most scenes contain little or no action at all. The movie works as a dark drug abuse drama with occasional doses of hilarious dialogue from Robert Downey Jr. Definitely on the "must buy the DVD" list.

The movie is an adapation of a book and by virtue of which it must skip certain subplots and characters. A Scanner Darkly - Philip K.Dick immediately after watching the movie makes for a great read and is highly reccommended to fill up what might seem like plot-holes.

2007-01-01T20:42:00.000+05:30

The unavoidable brief period of inactivity was constructively utilized for failed attempts at securing employment in establishments offering better pay packages and medical benefits. This blog will now be given its due and posts shall henceforth be made weekly.
There's a winged insect making noisy love to the tubelight and I want it to die now.
Happy New Year.

2006-11-15T22:17:00.000+05:30

Respite.

Hi,
I was on a vacation with no access to blogger. Please excuse.
I bring some extraordinary pictures shot on state of the art professional equipment. (The date display on the Chennai set are wrong though).

Hiranandani Gardens, Mumbai.

Chennai.

2006-09-11T00:10:00.000+05:30

Sillunu Oru Kadhal - Awful.

The first half can almost pass for a chick flick. The second is a piece of excrement worse than an episode of a TV serial.

The plot is weak. The comedy is lame. The dialogues are awkward. The movie doesn't seem to end... Please don't get me wrong. I like bad movies. I'm entertained by them. But Sillunu/jillunu -i-don't-care is so beyond bad I just can't understand how this film got made. You'd think Surya or Jo would've realized at some point that the movie was pointless but no.

Arrgghhhhhhhh.. this movie cannot be reviewed.
Let me just say this movie has absolutely no redeeming qualities. Even Rahman's brilliant music cannot save this mess. Remember what you imagined in your mind when you heard the songs the first time? Let those visuals stay in your head. Do not let the director overwrite it and leave a bad taste everytime you play it... lord, what were they thinking filming New York Nagaram in Switzerland? Every other song is a poorly shot misfit.

Man, this was bad!

Avoid. Like the plague.
Two thumbs way down!

2006-08-27T13:59:00.000+05:30

Who's the man? Kamal's the man!
.

The greatest Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu review ever.

Greetings everyone.

First off, I urge you, do not read the reviews at Sify and Galatta.com. They are filled with spoilers and reveal almost half the story.

I watched the movie in INOX, Bangalore - the reel changers, theatre operators, janitors and ushers were competent enough and did not influence my review of the movie.

Without further ado, I present to you a spoiler-free review that will help you decide if you want to watch VV or not.

To start with, lets look at the cast.

Kamal:
You've seen Vikram, Surya, Prakash raj, heck.. even Arjun, Parthiban & Vijayakanth play tough in uniform. Around 15 years ago.. there was this movie(Khaki Sattai, was it?) where Kamal plays a youngster whose ambition is to be a policeman. He gets the police uniform stitched by a tailor and when he wore it for the first time, I thought it fit him very well.

Cut to 2006. In Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu, Kamal as DCP Raghavan proves he's still the best dressed cop out there. Period. The confidence, the charm, the walk, the sunglasses, the tejas ... Unbeatable!
Whether he's acting out an emotional scene or whoopin a bad guy's ass, Kamal totally rules!
Kamal Hassan is worth the price of admission alone. ( *fanboy alert!*)

Kamalinee Mukherjee: pretty but disposable.

Jyothika: The zero chemistry between Kamal and Jo leads me to strongly suspect that loverboy Surya has warned her from getting close to Kamal. I'm almost positively sure that Surya might've been present on the sets while they were filming VV.

Prakash Raj: Small role, good nevertheless. (Some Mystic River Sean Penn-ish crying. Just as overdone. )

Remember the chain smoking bad guy who played Danny on Sun TV's Chitthi(yeah, I was forced to watch some episodes of it during dinner) This movie is definitely his biggest break and his acting prowess stands out, even in the presence of Kamal, very well.

Music:
Good idea releasing the movie before Harris Jayaraj's hit songs became old. All songs sound just as good as they did 6 months ago. The background score deserves special mention, it perfectly complements the action and moods in the film.

Direction, Screenplay and Camera:
Gautham skilfully directs "Another episode in a police officer's life". The line splashes across the screen at the start of the movie letting us know what we're in for.
In my astoundingly intelligent opinion, I must say its a largely intelligent movie, in many parts atleast. The viewers simply cannot second guess the screenplay in the first half. Its highly engrossing and very few scenes allow audience members to yell witty lines at the screen. They're stupid people anyway and would probably do so irrespective of the movie but yeah, the point I'm trying to make is even the ones responsible for such obnoxious behavior were making an effort to understand and were seriously paying attention. The editing is crisp. The scenes in between the action and detective work are entertaining and do not drag at all. The songs are perfectly placed. And well shot. But the Neruppae item number could have been avoided. The sights and scenery of New York are beautifully filmed. The settings and the locales for the crimescenes are wickedly pleasing and brilliant.

The bad: Kamal sounds a bit self indulgent at times, but hey, its Kamal. He's allowed to do all that. The twist -"Who could it be? Could it be Jyothika?" question is answered too soon. And the gory scenes have been shown in explicit detail. Rapes/murders/dead bodies get way too much exposure. I'm okay with that but sensitive people will have to look away or cover kids' eyes.

Still in doubt?

FAQ's

Q: Is Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu a good movie?
A: Yes, absolutely.

Q: Should I take my girlfriend/family to VV?
A: Its not exactly a perfect date movie.. You see, its downright gross in certain places. There are sequences involving extreme violence against women. And there's cursing too. Kids under 13, no way.

Q: Has Kamal kissed any of the heroines?
A: No. I mean, maybe.. but you don't get to see it on screen.

Q: Nudity?
A: Ahem...No! Dude, whats up with you?

Q: So you're reccommending I go see it as soon as possible?
A: Yeah man. Put it on top of your must-watch list. Bunk office/school/college if you have to.

Q: Can you lend me a 100 bucks? I promise I'll return it tomorrow.
A: No. Go away.

In conclusion, its a slick action-packed, raw & violent cop vs. serial killer thriller with very high production values. And Kamal Hassan in one of his best roles ever. And great music to go with. I think I can safely say we haven't seen many action films in the league of Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu. So will you stop critiquing it like it was Kubrick's work, brother?
Okay thats all you need to know. Just go watch it. Don't miss Gautam's cameo and the bloopers/deleted scenes that are shown in the end when the credits roll.

2006-08-11T01:33:00.000+05:30

Winter.

A large red smoky neon sign flickers unsteadily in the distance as acid rain drops descend slowly from a thousand feet up in the air to wash away paint from the walls of a suburban apartment building. The sea breeze sweeps a few drops on the window, some of them stick while the others slide off. The sounds of police car sirens (or was that an ambulance) from five minutes ago still ring in my head. I'd like to to hear something tranquil to get that off my ears .. like seagull cries interspersed with waves and orcas. Three notes of seagulls, a full wave hitting the shore, troubled orca wails to fade and crank up the volume -the final wave hits. Loop this sample.

Or I could just break a bottle.
The sound of a bottle breaking is a turbulent yet placid sound. Try it. For this experiment lets toss an A4 sized bottle at a wall with brute force. Pay attention. Visualize the scene in slow motion and freeze time at the instant when the bottle hits the wall. Pause.

Play.
Glass shatters and tiny fractals hurtle in random directions piercing the calm and then, there it is. The hum. It doesn't last long, so you gotta listen very carefully. If you missed it, use another bottle and try again. Once you do get to hear it, make a memory immediately. You can invoke that hum at will.

Requesting permission to stand.
brain notifying leg: we've lost contact, do you copy?
I think my leg's gone to sleep.

Girl in leopard print costume walks across the room. I need to reach for the remote before she does.

"There's no girl. We don't have a TV. Its all in your head."

But.. isn't everything?

Answer me.

I guess I need new friends. My opinion is of no consequence to you.

Feelings of @#%$% consume me. She's like a pharmaceutical product, I could just simulate her presence in our loveseat and that would be my fix for the day.
I worry sometimes. One of these days I'm going to leave a cartoon-like outline of myself when I crash through the windows and fall down fourteen floors.

Would you like to try the stuff I've been smoking?

PS: I know I've been posting erratically and I owe you an explanation, kind reader. I god promise to be a little more regular. Please continue to visit my blog.

2006-07-06T18:58:00.000+05:30

You're pitiful.

I wasn't gonna post until Sunday but this had me in splits.
Weird Al parodies James whiny Blunt's You're Beautiful.

Download it from any of these locations[safe for work, if you don't laugh like a horse(Suraj) or a hyena(Mr.Manager) ]

http://media.thechrispirilloshow.com/mp3/yourepitiful.mp3
http://www.weirdalforum.com/private/yourepitiful.mp3
http://www.al-oholicsanonymous.com/sounds/yourepitiful.mp3
http://www.allthingsyank.com/yourepitiful.mp3
http://www.thelostplanet.net/WeirdAl/yourepitiful.mp3
http://www.weirdal.com/

Well ya just can't dance
And forget romance
Everybody you know still calls ya..... Faaaaaaaarty Pants

James Blunt sounds different and he's talented yes, but too much of any kind of music does lead to a burnout. In an interview he told critics what they should do if they were tired of his tunes.
“You’re all adults, you can switch the radio off,” he said.
And popular radio took it one step further.
Two months back a British radio station banned James Blunt from their playlists and issued an announcement that they will no longer play or entertain requests for "You’re Beautiful” and “Goodbye My Lover.”

But "You're Pitiful" by Weird Al is hilarious. Just the song I'm going to hum all day and annoy everyone around especially James Blunt fans.

Lines I just won't sing are,

You're half undressed
Eatin' chips of your chest
While you're playin' Halo 2 (sung to the tune of " but its time to face the truth....")
No one's classier than you
Lalala la
Lalala la
Lalala la Loser

Now Weird Al. You're getting personal. These lines aren't funny and they're not even remotely related to any of James Blunt's material. Leave gamers alone. Grrr!!

2006-06-20T02:18:00.000+05:30

Circus Clown.

What time of day is it?

I'm not claiming any special expertise in estimating distances but right now you are very far away from me. I beat my fist on the desk. Small ants had crawled out from nowhere in an orderly fashion to feed on a Snickers wrapper. There must've been thousands of them, I counted when they ran for their lives.

I know words aren't coming out right. Expecting my wind pipe to function normally at this time is simply asking too much. And this is the third time I dropped my phone and a minute back I came dangerously close to spilling water on my keyboard.

Please make me laugh. I feel like a piano that fell from the sixth floor. I had a little plan to destroy the world but I forgot it rightaway. I'm tired of the silent corner. I walk to the coffee machine.. my legs are so resigned I'll fall if I don't stop thinking about you.

Sure, you're replaceable. There's enough fish for all of us. Right. I look at every girl the way a cat looks at a fishbowl. Sometimes I think of every relationship that could've been if I only had some clever lines to say. No, I don't feel lonely and wish I had someone to love.

Pitt's perfect girl does not a lover make. Not Natalie Portman either. Not now.

Oh I rue this day.

I stepped out of Suraj's shoes.

"You're right. It sucks to be you. Just hang in there man. You'll be alright in a few days. I'm asking you again, do you want to catch a movie with us after work?"

2006-06-02T21:54:00.000+05:30

1.45 pm, Undisclosed office complex.

The meeting rooms have glass panels on the door for you to tell if its occupied or not. Sometimes you can see more than just people seated. The accoustics of these rooms aren't great either so you can hear muffled voices too. And as you walk by the peep hole you see lively arguments, sudden vociferous outbursts of a guy who likes to disagree a lot with the speaker who by the way isn't doing a very good job of the presentation. I just want to barge in, take charge of the guy's laptop, point to the colorful graph projected on the screen and come up with a solution. And then everyone in the room would applaud.

I'm on my way to the cafeteria. Strange things are thought of when you're hungry and you had to take your break an hour late. I hate the way the elevator smells of lunch. Maybe we should send everyone a memo reminding them that its not okay to burp in the elevator. Its the mirrors in the elevator that make you feel comfortable, right? You adjust your shirt, comb your hair, and if you're the only one in there, you don't think twice about letting out a loud burp too. Your floor arrives. Doors slide open giving you just enough time to exit but the end products of your metabolic activity linger. And when you pass me on your way out, I may even greet you with a smile unaware that I'm going to be subjected to a very unpleasant elevator ride.

2.30pm, Happy place.

The after-lunch smoke. Pure bliss. Rivalled only by the.. Burp! Excuse me..
I think I'll take the stairs. Its good to walk after a meal.

2006-06-01T02:38:00.000+05:30

Pudhupettai - Right on!

These days I go to office on weekends. Sad, I know.. all thanks to the work I have pending. This weekend, after office I went to watch Pudhupettai at PVR and was thoroughly satisfied with time well spent. I come back home, turn on my computer and I'm surprised at the number of people who hate the movie and all the negative reviews floating around blogs. Am I weird for liking a movie that everyone dismisses off as a flop? This has happened before, but come on, this kind of hatred towards quality cinema is unacceptable. It surely doesn't deserve its current fate in the blogosphere where its being bashed by half assed snooty elitists who're either looking for 'sophisticated' commercial films(read ManiRatnam/Kamal hassan) or crowd pleasers where the protagonists are all larger than life heroes.

So here I am professing my Pudhupettai love and registering my two thumbs up for the movie.
I didn't find it too lengthy, the director did not lose the plot in the second half and no the whole thing is not a copy of an english movie. Every scene is beautifully crafted. There are plenty of splendid moments in the movie apart from the few that pay homage to epic gangster movies. Scenes inspired by Tarantino look pleasing too. The Tamil film industry has a few talented film makers and Selvaraghavan is a welcome addition to the league.

This movie is easily one of the best films of the year but sadly will not be a box-office success. I'd love to write a long review but I'm at work now, so I'll resort to copypasting the work of a professional. From a handful of positive reviews, this review by Baradwaj Rangan (You might also like his take on Tamil cinema) completely sums up my thoughts on the movie.

I know a lot of people who won’t watch Selvaraghavan movies. I’ll tell them he’s the most excitingly raw filmmaker in Tamil cinema today, that even if his films don’t hold up as a whole there are enough individual moments of brilliance – but they just won’t go to his cinema because of the kind of lowlives his protagonists are. I know I’m treading on thin ice here, but at the heart of this is the whole high-class versus low-class business. A lot of people mistake Selvaraghavan’s movies for low-class movies – that is, the movies created for the sweepers and the factory workers and the ayahs and the auto drivers. They’ll watch Mani Ratnam’s Aayitha Ezhuthu, where Madhavan’s lowlife is presented in impressively art-directed squalor, but they can’t bring themselves to watch 7G Rainbow Colony because the hero says the heroine regards him as “therula kadakkara saani.” In other words, crassness in a character is apparently okay, but crassness in the presentation isn’t.

But this crassness is the key to Selvaraghavan’s work; it’s why his films get under your skin like a nagging itch. Pudhupettai charts the rise-through-the-ranks of a hoodlum named “Kokki” Kumar (Dhanush), and the early parts of the film show Kumar as a schoolboy. (Yes, a crass schoolboy.) In one scene, he’s trying to outrun his mother who’s after him with a cane, and yet, when he passes a pubescent girl, he stops momentarily to leer, “Enna, vayasukku vandhuttiya?” You’ll never find this happening in a Mani Ratnam movie, because his instincts are resolutely middle-class; a respect for women is ingrained in him. Yet, you have to admit that this is what someone like “Kokki” Kumar, who grows up in the slums, is likely to do. As a member of the middle-class, as a member of the balcony audience, you cringe at this moment, but at the same time, you are grateful for the visceral reaction it produces – no, provokes – in you.

No wonder, then, that the first song in the movie goes Enga area ulla varaadhey! This could almost be a warning to a certain section of the audience, because Kumar and his cronies say that Puthupettai, Vyasarpadi, Ennore and Kasimedu are their areas, while Anna Nagar, KK Nagar, T Nagar and Boat Club are ours. But the thing about this film – as with all of Selvaraghavan’s films – is that it may be about them, but it isn’t necessarily only for them. Anyone with an interest in cinema would be part of the audience for Pudhupettai, because it’s been made with brains and a vision. Right from the first scene in a jail cell, you can see Selvaraghavan knows exactly what he’s doing. The right half of the screen is lit in a lurid red, the left in an equally lurid, phosphorescent green. You think the frame, the image, perhaps indicates the split-personality of Kumar (who’s in the cell), but much, much later, when Kumar gets into politics, Selvaraghavan zooms in on a map of Chennai; the areas that belong to Kumar are in green, his rival’s are in red.

This is just a tiny visual payoff, but the major innovation of Pudhupettai – other than the fact that it asks us to invest in a protagonist who’s basically a sewer rat with no redeeming qualities – is in its telling. The heavily melodramatic story is narrated as a series of flashbacks, and Selvaraghavan doesn’t let his scenes play out so much as let them fade in and fade out, making them seem like random bursts of memory. (That’s why there’s no beginning-middle-end feel; the climax doesn’t wrap the movie up with a neat bow so much as set it adrift on a different course.) Early on, for instance, you see in the background Kumar’s mother being slapped by her husband; the screen turns black, then when she’s serving her son dinner, her cheek is swollen. End of moment. (Many of these sequences do not have a background score, though I couldn’t see why because there are other places where Yuvan Shankar Raja goes rather overboard with symphonic swells. Somehow, it doesn’t sound right when the lives of these people are underscored by horns and cellos.)

Selvaraghavan shows an impressive feel for his material, and there are as many scenes that exist at a level of poetry as there are that play rousingly to the gallery, especially the song sequences. Yuvan’s chartbusters are so smoothly blended in, I couldn’t pick out the point where, say, the dialogue ended and the Variya number began. The energy of the dancers seems to spill over to every nook and corner of the slum. And though this isn’t the kind of film that warrants a comedy track, there are surprising laughs throughout. The best segment in the movie shows Kumar being taught how to carry out a hit – he’s being trained by a senior hood, in a twisted variation of a senior police officer showing a rookie cop the ropes – and it’s funny and scary at once, just like the other bit that’s at once funny and horrifying. (A member of Kumar’s gang – one of a dazzling array of relatively unknown character actors – recalls asking his mother why she lay down beside the tailor whenever his father was out; he got a bucket of scalding water for an answer.) There’s a lighter side to these mean streets, all right; it’s just tinged with blood (or maybe hot water).

As is inevitable in movies dealing with gangsters – and this is merely a reflection of our society today – there’s a point after which politics slowly creeps in. Till then, we’ve seen Kumar’s life with his parents, his life with a local prostitute (played with enormous dignity by Sneha), but soon the story shifts from the personal to the political, and then back to the personal, and then again to the political... This may be one of the big miscalculations of Selvaraghavan, for however fresh and exciting the way he presents these events, the life and times of a party hoodlum aren’t exactly new to us. There’s little here we haven’t seen earlier, or cannot predict. The self-indulgently arty pacing in these scenes doesn’t help either. These are the times the film looks like it has nowhere to go, and is getting there extremely slowly.

The other problem is Dhanush. He certainly looks the part, because Kumar is described as “pencil-la kodu potta maadhiri,” but more than the physical appearance, Kumar needs to look like a kid who gets no respect from the grown-ups. He may lop off hands and chop off heads, but there are others around him who have done all this and more, and they can’t digest taking orders from this skinny newbie. And everywhere that Dhanush is required to be a still presence, he’s fine. He’s actually more than fine in his scenes with Sonia Agarwal, who’s presented – as she was in 7G Rainbow Colony – as this ideal object of desire, a contrast from Kumar in every imaginable way.

But Kumar is also made to do things like talk directly to the audience, and at places like this (and where he’s required to rave and rant), Dhanush is so self-consciously showy, it’s hard to take. But that’s also probably the character itself, for it isn’t everyday we get to watch a Tamil movie where the only instincts the protagonist possesses are those of an animal. Kumar needs food and sex, he knows fear, he can express rage, he’ll do anything to save his skin, and... that’s it. Even the emotions he displays towards the prostitute he’s with seem more territorial than anything else; I wasn’t sure that he ever loved her, just that he didn’t want to share her with anyone else. It’s only when he has a child that we see glimmers of selfless emotion for another person; after all, even animals have feelings for their young.

With a better lead, and with a little less self-indulgence, Pudhupettai could have been something of a mood masterpiece, but even as it is, it’s a fascinatingly idiosyncratic work. Selvaraghavan may have borrowed an image of a man being pushed into a freshly-dug grave from Zhang Yimou’s Shanghai Triad, and there may be a nod to Coppola’s Godfather Part II in the courtroom sequence where Kumar intimidates a witness who’s turned approver by bringing the latter’s mother to the courtroom – if he squeals, she’ll die – but this is largely a very fresh, very original work. You can see it in the colours used; they’re loud, yes, not in a T Rajendar-art-direction way, but in a way that suggests that they’ve leapt out of your subconscious. A good portion of Pudhupettai works at that very primal level, the way folk art does. I know there’ll be lots of people who’ll turn up their noses and stay away, but that doesn’t change the fact that, for all its flaws, this is very high-class filmmaking.

Overall it is highly absorbing save for a few faults. It does get a bit uneven towards the end but nothing that detracts the quality as a whole. Oh yeah it would've been a good film if it had ended the way viewers wanted it to end. Dear retards, you can decide the ending when you make your own movie. Another gripe people seem to have is the duration. The movie runs for nearly 3 hours. Some theatre operators have snipped 30 minutes of the movie based on audiences reacting that it is excessively long. I'll be the first to buy the 4 hour Director's Cut Extended Version DVD if there is one.

2006-05-11T20:30:00.000+05:30

If your playlist contains over one hundred songs and Winamp's shuffle morph rate is set to "fast", tracks are played in the most whackiest order ever. Merke Merke- Kanda Naal Mudhal is followed by
Korn- La petit mort and then Halloween- Dave Matthews Band.

Five minutes seven seconds later, the track playing now is Space Dog by Tori Amos.
Now this song must rank very highly among the quirkiest Tori songs ever. The song has haunting vocals and piano that seamlessly switch between different moods.
But what is she singing about? I don't know. Its upto so many different interpretations. Tori says in an interview that the song is about her deity, the Space Dog(!) who comes to visit her sometimes. Others say the whole thing is about a mushroom trip. Halfway through the song, she herself doesn't know, "seems i keep getting this story twisted so where's Neil when you need him" she sings. She's referring to fantasy writer Neil Gaiman whom she's close friends with. Tori, incidentally is also contributing to Neil's album titled "Where's Neil when you need him" which is a tribute to his work. She's one of the 17 artists, who've written songs about Gaiman's stories, characters or setting for this compilation. No, he doesn't sing but his writing and artwork will be on the 20 page CD booklet. The CD is expected to release on July 18,2006. Neil Gaiman fans can preorder the CD here.

And next on the playlist there's Elvis singing you were always on my mind..

I like Winamp's shuffle mode.

2006-05-08T01:55:00.000+05:30

Hello. I'm still around.
I've not disappeared off the face of the earth, yet.
Contrary to what many think, its my job thats been taking up most of my time and not my new "friend".

Anyway, I think I'm in love and all that. So I'm going to try my hand at poetry now.

You caught me
sneaking glances
at you while you licked your finger tips.
Will I see you here sometime
two tables away on a warm sunday afternoon?
For if I had the chance to do it again
I wouldn't pass it by.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tamil Nadu elections 2006. All parties are offering goodies galore .. Color TVs, Acres of land, Computers, Rice etc.. all up for grabs. Please vote wisely. However, I will eat my hat if DMK comes to power and offers free Color TVs to everyone.

Give this girl a break!
Seriously, give her a break in TV or Movies or something. She may not be able to write but thats no excuse to turn down a career in showbiz.

Mission: Impossible III might actually be good. Why? J.J. Abrams, the genius behind the TV series LOST is the director. Philip Seymour Hoffman(Capote) is the villain. Maybe I'll quit being a snob and watch it when it does come out here.

2006-04-18T19:35:00.000+05:30

At the risk of sounding like an excitable 13 year old, I have to say..

She has the most amazing phone voice ever.

Do you remember.. back in your schooldays.. Its a regular evening, you're at home with your family halfway through dinner smalltalk watching TV and the phone rings. You know who it is, you've been waiting for this call quite sometime(it should've rung half hour back). You reach for the cordless and retire to your room. Your parents give you quizzical looks, they know you ain't coming back anytime soon. This has been going on for a week now and they want to talk to you about it.

Well, those days are back again. I gush like a schoolkid everytime I see her name flash on my cellphone. I didn't think I was capable of two hour phone conversations anymore.. thought I grew out of it 8 years ago.

...yeah I know. With this, I lose my tough guy badge and my blog spirals into mediocrity but meeting her last week ignited rocket thrusters on my legs and I blasted off into outer space amidst a huge rumble and clouds of exhaust.

2006-04-07T16:22:00.000+05:30

Confessions of an unpaid homebased beerdrinking chickenwings eating movie critic:
I'm a sucker for any movie which stars a gun wielding Bruce Willis.
I have all the Die Hard movies on DVD. So what if you didn't like 16 Blocks? I'll secretly watch it at home inspite of the bad reviews online. There's more to him than the honest cop who beats up local thugs/ international terrorists/ other not so honest cops. He's capable of playing lead roles in other genres too, you name it he's been there, romance (The Story of Us, Moonlighting), comedy (The Whole Nine Yards, Friends), sci-fi (The Fifth Element, 12 Monkeys) , thriller (The Sixth Sense, do you remember the stellar father figure like screen presence) and film noir (Sin City, Pulp Fiction). But till this very day, he remains one of the most typecast and underrated actors in the industry.

Whether you play John Hartigan or John McLane.. Mr.Willis, I admire you and I'd like to have a beer with you someday.

Opens this weekend in the US. Coming soon to a theatre near you.

"Lucky Number Slevin," a shallow, dandified grandson of "Pulp Fiction", is the movie equivalent of a junior high school showoff desperate to prove he knows more than the teacher. Frantically raising his hand to answer every question, he exhibits the gleeful self-satisfaction of a quiz kid explaining the theory of relativity.

But because the teacher in this case is Quentin Tarantino, topics like the merits of the various James Bonds, the plot of "North by Northwest" and the personality of a 50's cartoon character called the Shmoo are what matters. In the Tarantino school, the pesky loudmouth might get an A. But what good would it do him in the real world?

Read the rest of the NY Times Review here

2006-04-02T05:36:00.000+05:30

Irreversible(2002)

Written and Directed by Gaspar Noe(I haven't seen his other films) this French movie is by far one of the most disturbing movies ever made. If you thought A Clockwork Orange was violent, you really need to see this. Its not entirely gore, there's no gangsters, no guns,.. the characters are regular people. One moment you're squirming in your seat at some of the most disgusting and violent acts ever viewed on screen and in the other you're lost in a tender love scene of a couple waking up to each other.

When it was shown at Cannes Film Festival, around 200 people(mostly professional film critics) walked out of the screening, sickened(physically) and needing medical attention. I don't believe in giving out any spoilers so I won't delve into the story. Basically, the gruesome events taking place on a night in Paris are shown backwards (a la Christopher Nolan's Memento). I can't even begin to tell you how real the movie is. It consists of 12 seperate single-take continuous segments without cuts. Camerawork is mostly handheld and its constant movement might cause viewers to get nauseated. The acting is very natural, much of the dialogue is unscripted and Monica Belucci is beauty personified.

The film doesn't glorify or glamorize violence. Yes, there is a stark & horrifying rape scene and a brutal murder, both shot very explicitly but then again, its a sick world, face it. These things happen at alarming rates as per crime statistics in the US/India/anywhere in the world.

Verdict: Unforgivingly disturbing. Not for the faint of heart.

2006-03-28T02:26:00.000+05:30

Monday. 10:15am.

Revving your bike waiting for the signal to turn green can be a stressful activity. Especially when you're running late to work. You might as well stop revving, 'cause time's not gonna fly by any faster even if you're at 9000RPM unless you fuckin engage the clutch.

So there I was, watching the signal timer count backwards from 85 seconds and reading it aloud in my head (.. 79.. 78.. 76..) frankly, its not very easy on your mind. Seemed like a good time to reflect on the past week.

Last Tuesday:
My boss hinted at things going well at work and probably confirmed employment. I hate to be on contract. I'm on a 6 month contract and only 3 things can happen at the end of it.
(i) You're on board(if you're exceptionally good)
(ii) You're fired(If they decide to slim the team or if you suck at your job)
(iii) The contract gets extended another 6months(if you choose to cruise and do just enough work to get by).
During this time period, you're not officially part of the company you work at and you don't get any of the benefits bestowed upon regular employees since you're on the contracting company's payroll. Its all got something to do with the headcount. They've allocated limited heads for the team in India. But at the rate things are going, its bound to look up.. I sure do hope so.

Friday:
Anyway, Derailed is an awesomely bad movie. I'm deeply saddened when I think of the viewers who pay multiplex money to watch it. I'd be better off writing a review of the aesthetics of multiplex restrooms however, I'll say a thing or two about the movie to warn humankind. The trailers are misleading, don't believe them, for its nothing but a highly predictable wannabe thriller which severely insults your intelligence. Awesomely bad movies like this need generous amounts of nudity but sadly there was none inspite of the R rating. I like you Jen, I want good things for you. And I would like it if you didn't choose to act in such trash at this point of time in your career.
Movie Tagline: They Never Saw It Coming.
I did and I want my money back.

Thursday, lunchtime:
I saw the girl who closely resembles my 8th standard classmate in the office cafeteria again. Its only curiosity that makes me want to check if it really is her. But I can't walk up to her with "Did we go to school together at NPS?". That would definitely be a strong contender for lamest pickup line of 2006. Well.. she's not that great anyway, we didn't talk much back in school. So.. I'll walk by her a few times, talk loudly on my cellphone or make conversation with the caterers when she's around .. that way she'll know I'm street and cool.

The signal eventually turned green and I did get to rocket off the line faster than every car and bike around me.

Wheee..

2006-03-20T00:27:00.000+05:30

Crayon

The room was lit by a single flickering lightbulb.
He whispered softly, "Lets play a game".
She was not interested.
"Its very easy. I'll even let you win".
She shook her head in disgust.
Scenes from his childhood kept coming back. The house in the village seemed like a distant memory. Dad got transferred to this southern state where he didn't speak the language. His home was now a cramped suburban apartment complex where noisy children played till their play area became parking spaces. After it grew dark, parked cars were good for Hide n' Seek. They continued to play. But all he did was watch, hoping that someone would ask him to join. The fact that he was fat and had a running nose didn't win him any friends. Once, a curious bespectacled child did invite him, but he totally sucked at 'Dog & the bone'. He just didn't fit in and eventually it wasn't cool to be seen playing with him anymore. The treatment wasn't very different in school either.
The aging filament dimmed the light emitted by the bulb. Inconsistent rays announced the onset of its imminent end to the room. As disturbed as he was, thoughts of euthanasia did cross his mind.

He extricated the scarf that gagged her. She choked briefly when a fresh gust of air found its way through her wind pipe.
"Please let me out!! HELP!!", she screamed her pretty lungs out.
She was unable to move her hands which were tied to the chair. Her spectacles fell down as her body protested to being tied in the same postion for over five hours.
"I will. But first, lets play a game".
He gently rested her spectacles on her nose bridge and pushed it upwards. She stopped screaming only for a second to let her mind recognize the familar face.
The bulb seemed to burn brighter for a moment as it flickered violently.

Her piercing cries roused her from sleep. She breathed heavily while her mind retrieved the configuration of her new surroundings. It was still dark. Her bed didn't feel right. She heard metallic sounds as she moved her legs. Under the sheets, she was horrified to feel the cold links of a chain that shackled her to the bed. The nightmare wasn't over just yet.

"Attention. Disturbence in Cell 3A. Immediate assistance required",
a female voice looped over the intercom.

Lights came up in Cell 3A. Four men in labcoats rushed in to see a hysteric display akin to that of a vociferous caged animal.

"She's losing it, Bill", said one of the men in a very concerned tone.

It took three men to hold her down while Bill injected a highly potent sedative in her right hand. The seizures subsided as the drug steadily took command of her senses. A minute later, he reached out and lifted her eyelids one by one. They offered no resistance and he could see that her pupils were maximally dilated.

After positioning her back in bed, the men in labcoats turned off the lights.

2006-03-16T00:31:00.000+05:30

Anna's TAG.

Since all of you totally lost the point of the previous post [which
was a display of my brilliant singing abilities], here's something
elementary :) .

50 Questions.

Time of starting? March 14, 3.00 pm

1. Were you named after anyone? Yeah. God.

2. Do you wish on stars? Yes.

3. When did you last cry? I'm not telling.

4. Do you like your handwriting? Not now. But it was really good during those ink-pen days.

5. What is your favourite meat? Chicken and Seafood equally.

6. What is your most embarrassing CD on your shelf? Maxi Dance 1998(It has remixes of Aqua).

7. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you? Depends. Like if I was Angelina Jolie, I wouldn't be friends with me, right?

8. Are you a daredevil? No.

9. How do you release anger? Instantly yelling at the source(stupid remote! bang! bang!! Work, damn it!) or taking it out on other people(Can you keep the TV down?? I'm trying to think here!!)

10. Where is your second home? Office.

11. Do you trust others easily? No way!

12. What was your favourite toy as a child? G.I.Joe, He-Man and Glo Worms (They glow in the dark!!).

13. What class in school/college do you think is totally useless?All classes have a point and I hate them equally. No wait, I think I can sit through Physics, Maths and English.

14. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Yes.(Seldom do people get it).

15. Have you ever been in a mosh pit? No, but I was in the VIP enclosure of the Joe Satriani concert.

16. What do you look for in a guy/girl? I'm extremely demanding. The answer wouldn't fit here.

17. Would you bungee jump? Yes.

18. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? Rarely.

19. What's your favourite ice cream? Chocolate.

20. What are your favourite colours? Black, Brown and White.

21. What are your least favourite things? Refer 10 things I hate.

22. How many people do you have a crush on right now? One.

23. Who do you miss most right now? Being in New York City. Never been there before, but I miss it. I heart NYC.

24. What are you listening to right now? Thazhuvudhu - Ah Aah, Professional Widow - Tori Amos, Where did you sleep - Nirvana ( full volume on my earphones in office. Really stimulating work music. Feel free to click on the link and download it. Password: vince)

25. If you were a crayon, what colour would you be? Black. duh!

26. What is the weather like right now? Hot.

27. Last person you talked to on the phone? A friend.

28. The "first" thing you notice about the opposite sex? Height, Teeth.

29. Do you like the person who sent you this?- Do I have to?

30. How are you today? Peachy, thanks and you?

31. Favourite non alcoholic drink?Coffee, non alcoholic Beer.

32. Favourite alcoholic drink?Rum, alcoholic Beer.

33. Natural hair colour? Black.

34. Eye colour? Brownish Black.. more Black than brown.

35. Wear contacts? No.

36. Siblings? One. Younger.

37. Favourite month? March.

38. Favourite food? Anything Chicken or Seafood.

39. Favourite day of the year? None.

40. Have you ever been too shy to ask someone out? No.

41. Scary movies or happy endings? No preferences there. I like all genres. Any well made movie is fine.

42. Summer or winter? Summer. The cold can get to you sometimes.

43. Do you want your friends to write back? - You mean, when I write to them? Yeah.

44. Who is most likely to respond? I wouldn't know.

45. What book/magazine are you reading? Nothing in particular. A lot of blogs, yes.

46. What's on your mouse pad? There's no mousepad.

47. What did you watch on TV last night?- What is this TV you speak of?

48. Favourite Smell? Rain, Food, Shoes, Books...

49. Have you ever regretted breaking up with someone? Yeah, after she got married!

50. Most tiresome thing you've ever experienced/done? Breaking up with her.

Time of finishing? March 15, 10:15 pm

There you go, Anna. I think I'm the first one to finish it. I need bonus points for that.

2006-03-14T01:44:00.000+05:30

What makes a Boyband?

Strip away the music. Lets analyze the vocals of two popular bands.

Metallica-One (click here and press play/download)

BackstreetBoys- Hetfield's Version (click here and press play/download)

Is it the lead vocalist's voice ?

2006-03-09T19:08:00.000+05:30

Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu - But when??

Looks like we won't get to see Kamal in his latest avatar anytime soon. Thanks to the financial problems plaguing this movie, its been postponed again :(
Courts have stayed the release of this movie until all the IOUs are honored.

Now, what can be said of Kamal that hasn't been said before. The release date of a Kamal Hassan starrer is almost equivalent to that of a festival in Tamil Nadu. And in 2006, Kamal's Tamil new year offering(hopefully!) will be Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu - a murder mystery, where the story takes him to New York to track down a killer.

Check out the trailer here.

What to look out for: Kamal Hassan(in uniform!), action sequences - involving helicopters, FBI, NYPD and the baddies, chase scenes in busy New York streets.. I guess, a typical police drama with Kamal's touch(read lots of blood, gore etc..).

In addition to Jyothika, Bengali girl Kamalini Mukherjee also stars as one of the female leads ;) Anyways, Kamal plays a cop after a really long time and director Gautam Menon has proved himself with cop dramas before. With this Kamal-Gautam combo, I'm certain we can be assured of fireworks on screen.

The music by Harris Jayaraj (Audio launch: 6th March 2006) is bound to be a hit. Thanks to the wonders of the internet, you can download the mp3 s here(Internet leak date: 6th March 2006).

Haven't heard the songs enough to give you a music review, but they sound really good in my car.

*Disclaimer: I don't host any of the mp3s, nor did I rip them. All credits and class action lawsuits go to the ones that did. These are just links I found on the web. And don't complain if the links are down too.

2006-03-05T23:13:00.000+05:30

'10 things I hate' as of right now.

1. The Black Eyed Peas.
2. Self-righteous fucktards.
3. Taps that drip(Call me obsessive compulsive, but I just have to close every one of them tightly, just can't stand water being wasted.)
4. a. Cars with body odor.
b. Men/Women with body odor.
5. Black Eyed Peas(I can't hate them enough. They're nearly as disgusting as watching a squeamish blonde on Fear Factor eating mouthfuls from a bowl filled with worms, eels and cockroaches. Peas, do the world a favor and disband immediately.)
6. Traffic Jams.
7.People who don't have the balls to use Linux but cannot stop complaining on and on about how sucky Windows is.( If you're one of them - First, learn to install Linux and then, you're allowed your share of ms-bashing and whining. Till then, shut the fuck up and be thankful that you have something that makes you use words like email and internet on a daily basis.)
8. Pens that don't work! (Where's that pen when you need one!!??)
9. Precocious kids.
10. Cruelty to Animals (Yes, I'm a non-vegetarian and I'm selective about what animals you absolutely cannot be cruel to. Dogs, Cats and Horses are some of my favorites. I'll definitely murder anybody that dares to inflict any kind of harm to the above mentioned animals or atleast ask them nicely to stop whatever they're doing. Really, what kind of a sick mind would derive pleasure from being mean to animals? I can understand if men want to shoot each other, some of them can be real morons but what did the poor animal do. )

2006-02-24T04:28:00.000+05:30

I've got a confession to make...

I've been in jail.
You heard me. Yes.. Incarcerated, behind bars, locked up..

I answer 'Yes' to the "Have you ever been convicted of a Criminal Offense? " question in a job application.

I didn't kill anybody, but I almost broke a man's skull in what should've been a harmless road rage incident. Somehow it didn't occur to me to just punch him in the face with my bare fist.

It was a bright and sunny Tuesday morning. Traffic was like mud. Vehicles oozed their way through one of the worst jams ever.

It was one of those minor accidents which happen as a result of incorrect driving practices by both parties. Immediately after the accident occurred, he stopped his car right in the middle of the road to inspect the damage. He remained totally unaffected by the numerous horns blaring away. The vehicles in front of him were not moving as yet, but they'd eventually move and his car would be in the way. The myriad honking sounds continued as he approached me.

Your mind begins to assess the possible outcomes instantly in the event of a confrontation. If there is a percieved threat, the body undergoes several changes to help you deal with it. There's increased breathing, heart rate and blood pressure. This enables oxygen rich blood flow to the limbs which in turn equips you to fight or to flee, depending on the situation at hand. And in my case, choosing to fight didn't require too much thought considering he was shorter than me, probably in his late 20s and looked like he was new to the city.

He wanted to know what I was trying to do back there without a hand signal or an indicator. I told him that the use of an indicator was unnecessary when everyone except him were travelling at 20km/h and his sudden urges to sprint forward every time the vehicle in front moved an inch, caused the accident. He responded with a loud explanation of how wrong I'd been and how doing so might have killed me. All this while, he kept pointing fingers at my face as he reconstructed the events for the motorists who were just tuning in. I wouldn't point fingers at my face if I were him.

Funny, the others on the road didn't have much to say, the honking seemed to die down too as some of them listened attentively to the details and began to take sides. They probably knew that they were not getting anywhere, might as well get to see a fight. Sure enough, they did.

It got louder. There was cursing. I only wish he didn't use that word.

I took a swing at his face with my helmet. I know its not going to work in my favor if I tell you that I thought he was gonna block it. A powerful blow to the head with a blunt object could be fatal in some cases. Epidural hematoma is the result of internal bleeding where blood collects in the area between the outer membrane of your brain and the insides of the skull. This in turn causes the brain to slowly compress and make room for the blood spill. Luckily, this couldn't have happened since the thick viscous fluid seemed to flow down the sides of his left cheek, through a major laceration above his eyebrow.

He fell face down on the road without much of a scream. The audience that watched the events unfold, comprised of two kinds of people: the 'I don't give a fuck if there's a dead man on the road-I can't be late to work' kind and the ones that agreed with the treatment meted out. There may have been a third kind, but you don't want to mess with a stranger after he just bludgeoned a guy who spoke too much and is still holding his weapon of choice.

For the sake of brevity, lets just say the assailant got the victim admitted into a hospital and covered for all of his medical expenses.

You don't get away with attempt to murder so easily but being related to the newly appointed Chief Minister does help. There is a pending criminal charge against me and it will remain in that state for a few years to come. It'll soon be long forgotten.

For now, it would really help if you stopped looking at me like that.

PS: This is my attempt at fiction. And for the record, with respect to confrontation, I can't send back soup.

2006-02-18T04:30:00.000+05:30

Itsy bitsy teenie weenie...

If you came here looking for Maria Sharapova in a swimsuit, just go away!
I'm not going to compromise my creative integrity for pictures of scantily clad tennis players. I will not reduce my blog to the likes of a girly magazine.

But for the benefit of those of my fellow men unaware of world events, I will however point you in the direction where the material in question is available. Also, I'd like to add that in addition to 22 high resolution pictures, there's a two minute video - a behind the scenes look at the photoshoot.

And needless to say, it won't be as pretty a sight if your manager happens to walk by, while you're looking at the photographer's assistant earnestly pour a glass of water on Maria Sharapova cavorting in a pink polka-dot bikini.

2006-02-17T00:26:00.000+05:30

ROMPER STOMPER(1992) - Australian cinema at its best

The DVD cover screams STUNNING and INTENSE. Romper Stomper is exactly that.

Russell Crowe(Hando) heads a team of neo nazi skinheads who are enraged at the influx of Asian immigrants into Australia. The story follows the grim events that unfold in the life of the gang members who get involved in a turf war with the immigrants. The movie is complete with disturbing scenes of hate crimes, graphic violence and sex.

Due to similarities in theme, comparisons with American History X are unavoidable. But it would be something tantamount to a hatecrime to compare Romper Stomper and American History X. (There are huge IMDb threads about it!)
AHX is polished, packaged and glossy, sometimes kind of sugarcoats the brutalities(there was room for a lot more). Edward Norton is brilliant as the protagonist in AHX. However, towards the latter part of the movie, he is depicted as undergoing drastic changes in his beliefs after a stint in prison. The reasons for his menacing skinhead character reforming are quite weak and frankly, very Hollywood. Somewhere the directors wussed out.

Romper Stomper is raw and a relatively more accurate portrayal of the ruthless skinheads without being too preachy. It is dark, ugly and in your face. The lowbudget feel and the camera work add to the realism. The authenticity in costumes and dialogues are startling, maybe something you can relate to in your rebellious days(if you were/are one!). The creators have done their homework a lot better than the AHX guys.

If there was a flaw, it would be that the some of the characters are not well developed. Not much is known about Hando. Not much is known about the origins of most of the other characters either. They're just thrust on screen leaving the viewer to imagine their past, which I think is good in a way too. It doesn't hamper your viewing experience but a little more history on the characters would've helped.

Russell Crowe gives one of the finest performances of his lifetime. Its a wonder how this movie went unnoticed because it ranks high up there with Gladiator, Beautiful Mind and Master&Commander when it comes to his acting abilities. If you're a Crowe fan, this is a must see! The actors who play Davey and Gabe give out powerful performances as well.

To sum it up, if you're not too much of a prude to handle the theme, you won't be disappointed. You will emerge shocked, disturbed and sickened.

Verdict: Must watch.

2006-02-13T16:29:00.000+05:30

The Google Monster cometh..

http://www.idorosen.com:80/mirrors/robinsloan.com/epic/ols-mattrobin-flash.swf

An old link, but interesting nevertheless.
This is an 8MB flash file which talks about how Google is going to take over all kinds of media. It predicts the doom of Microsoft, Operating systems, Online Shopping sites and The New York Times.

???? !!!

Personally, I think this is a perfect example of Googlemania gone overboard. You're not going use a GoogleOS, GPhone or a GPod or GPal in the next 5 years. I'd love to be proved wrong. Google and its toys do fascinate me, but lets not get carried away.

2006-02-12T23:18:00.000+05:30

Naan illai en vasam..

10.30am, Undisclosed office complex, a slightly uncomfortable cubicle.

I was making constructive use of the excessive free time at office listening to music, drinking coffee and browsing. I was reading a news article about the India-Pakistan matches when I found myself checking Winamp to see what song was playing.

"Chellame Idhu Irava Pagala.." from Kalaba Kadhalan

A wonderful duet by Karthik and Sunitha Sarathy. Do you remember Sunitha? Let me refresh your memory.

"Hey.. Goodbye Nanba.." Thats her.
[She's on "Yakkai Thiri.. (Fanaa)" also]

In ""Chellame Idhu Irava Pagala..", Sunitha emotes so well in her voice , she almost outshines Kartik. Listening to her sing on my headphones takes me away to a faraway place.
Women with husky voices always do that to me, but Sunitha's in a whole new league.

Just listen to this small clip.

You're probably thinking 'Nice voice, her Tamil is good'.

But you haven't heard anything until you've heard this.
Its a song from the movie "Kisna" called My Wish Comes True. A heartwarming track sung beautifully.

Wait, there's more.
ARRahman composed music for a Chinese film called "Warriors of Heaven and Earth". Sunitha is featured in the soundtrack on the song Warriors In Peace (English Version). I couldn't find the link to the full song, you're gonna have to make do with the 30 second demo from Amazon.

Too soft for you?

Listen to this one from Hollywood Bollywood. The track is If The Shoe Fits.

Ain't she adorable !!

Here's an excerpt from her interview to Femina(Reproduced without permission!).

"I have no formal training in music. I come from a musical background... my talent is the Lord's gift to me. I have never wanted to get voice trained either as I feel that certain characteristics in the voice could be lost by specialised training. And I never was the type to get pinned down by rules and classes... I was busy playing in the dirt and climbing trees.

A lot of my film work has been with Rahman. He's a genius (Gosh! I know I sound like every other person talking about him). He's also a wonderful person - simple, devout, and funny. He knows exactly what he needs. I knew 'Fanaa' would be a hit. In fact in that song, I do vocal bits over Rahman Sir's voice. I felt like I was gliding over a beautiful place. He lets you experiment and at the same time, knows how to get that 100 per cent out of you - even if it's at four in the morning.

I sing along to R&B, Soul and Hip-hop. But my influences are strongly R&B. I like Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey, Barbara Streisand - there are so many wonderful voices out there, I can't name them all. "

Not everybody would like her songs instantly but like all music, she grows on you too. I'm sure she's one of the best female vocalists around.

You might also like her other tracks:
EnnaiThedi - Jithan
Thoodu Varuma - Kakka Kakka
Ennai Pidikkum - Sathurangam
Ivanthan En - Kaadhal
I just hope she'd stop singing songs with weak lyrics like "Gori Tera"(from Saravana) or just plain weak songs like "Thottutae"(from Aaru).

But there's something about her raw untrained voice I can't really describe. I just love how high her voice can go, her hushed whispers, her seductive vocals.. they're so haunting! She's immensely talented and I'm sure she'll be appreciated in a really big way someday.

2006-02-07T01:46:00.000+05:30

Fun(??) with Dick and Jane !

I managed to watch Fun with Dick and Jane on thiruttuVCD and I'm so glad I didn't spend a hundred bucks in a multiplex and another hundred on Popcorn and Pepsi(Since when did popcorn cost as much as the movie? I remember spending 5 bucks on popcorn and 40bucks for the balcony ticket. And whats with people munching on their popcorn loudly during a tense scene? Are you so caught up in the movie that you gotta eat big mouthfuls ? Did your popcorn suddenly start to taste a whole lot better? Pipe down, will you!) Now thats off my head, back to the review..

Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't think twice about watching a Carrey flick. I've been a big fan of his since Batman Forever.
Jim Carrey is versatile, he can be atrociously funny(Ace Ventura) or take on serious roles(Eternal Sunshine.., Man on the Moon) but sadly none of these traits are visible in Fun with Dick.

Fun with Dick and Jane is a pointless remake of the 1977 comedy of the same name.
The 2005 version is produced by Jim Carrey himself.
When they started out making this movie, did they at any point of time think they were making a comedy? You will at the most laugh 3 times during the entire 90mins.
This movie is supposed to be a take on Enron. Now thats huge potential for a number of comic situations and hilarious gags, but the director fails at every attempt. It is neither a witty satire of the scandal nor a slapstick comedy. (Its not a heartfelt drama either, needless to say). Lagging screenplay, loose ends, plotholes big enough to drive BMTC buses - its got it all. You can't even forgive all that by saying, "Its a comedy!". No, its not.

Fun with Dick & Jane is not worth your time or your money. The movie is a huge letdown. If you really must watch it for Jim Carrey, do rent it or download it.
The funniest scenes are on the trailers, so you've used up 2 of your 3 laughs already.

Verdict: Do not watch unless forced to at gunpoint.

2006-01-24T02:21:00.000+05:30

I changed jobs, watched King Kong and my bike had a flat tyre.. These are the only interesting things that happened in over 2 months? Clearly, I lead a very uneventful life..

I'm gonna try my hand at fiction now.

2006-01-13T03:40:00.000+05:30

It could happen to you.

My bike had a flat tyre..
And its soo damn heavy to wheel it all the way to a puncture shop especially when the rear tyre is flat. What sucks even more is when all nearby puncture shops are closed for Bakrid.

We all take the air pressure in our bikes or for that matter even cars for granted.
There's really nothing much you can do if you're stuck with a flat tyre, in the middle of nowhere and no puncture shop in sight. Make it 11pm and add a first date to the picture.
No, that didn't happen to me. It was day and I was alone. Lets just get with the scenario okay??(No spare tyre, No mechanic in sight, Cellphone out of range)

So its the dead of the night, Nowhere Nagar, your bike/car wont budge, you dont want to force it run on a flat tyre at the risk of injuring you, your bike, your gf or oncoming traffic(not necessarily in that particular order )

so What the hell CAN you do?

1. Park the bike/car somewhere, take an auto and reach home? Sleep peacefully wondering what horrors befall your bike while you're all snuggled up in bed..

2. Pack your girlfriend in an auto and wheel the bike home 10kilometres in the dark?

3. Hitchhike a ride in a lorry for all three of you.. man, woman and bike?

There are more options, but I'm sure all of them sound scary, painstaking, timeconsuming, expensive...

Take my advice:
Fill air in your tyres weekly. Chances of a puncture are more likely in a tyre with low air pressure.
Remove sharp objects, pebbles, nails, stapler pins, pixies, etc stuck in your tyre treads whenever possible.
Replace the tube if you feel that your current tube has had its share of wear and tear.
Its not expensive when you think of the mental trauma you could experience in a situation, an example of which is described above. There are many more horrible everyday scenarios. A flat tyre on the way to work, college, an important job interview, exam, movie, party ..and the list goes on.
Get your tyres checked today!

Oh, and what did I do? I wheeled my bike to a petrol bunk which fortunately had a makeshift puncture fixing guy. Gotta love these multipurpose petrol bunks- ATMs, supermarkets, Coffeeshops .. they have it all! :)

2005-12-25T05:06:00.001+05:30

KING KONG - KING SIZE FUN

Okay, I thought the first post was hard. The second post is even harder. Hmm, what do I post now? No, I'm not gonna write about work, this blog is not exclusively about my escapades at work.

10 days since my first post... a lot of things have happened since then.. or haven't they?

Last weekend I watched King Kong. I can write a post about that. Good idea.

So here's a King Kong review or things I can say about King Kong in 10mins.

Loved it, inspite of some cliches here and there.

"Lets have a scene with a T-Rex attacking the heroine .. no, Spielberg did it in Jurassic Park.
Lets have a scene with two T-Rexes attacking the heroine.. nah, Spielberg did that too in Lost World.
Okay how about three T-Rexes, yeah , hasn't been done so far.. umm.. lets do that ! "

Overkill.

(Click for a really hi-res image)

Jack Black was one character that stood out in this movie. He comfortably eases into the role as the passionate film maker good guy who later turns bad. He brings comic relief when required. If there was somethin to look forward to in this movie beyond King Kong and Naomi Watts, its him!!

Naomi Watts as Ann Darrow.. *Whistle* ;) Nice Work!

Adrien Brody was wasted, grossly miscast and really, any particular reason why anyone thought him fit for a role in a King Kong movie? Beyond my comprehension!
The relationship between him and Ann Darrow didn't progress one bit as the movie unfolded.

The Island: Yes, how can you forget? The Island is the most important character with maximum screentime in the movie. Not King Kong, not Naomi Watts, yes its the island with its numerous monsters and creepy crawlies and the extremely scary tribals( They got me! I almost jumped from my seat when I first saw them... I'm easily scared, I know!)

Hey lets not discount the excellent performances by all ..Naomi, Kong, Jack Black, CGI, 3D models and the Visual Effects Team Members.

Overall a lovely movie, well made.. offers your ticket's worth for the entire 3 hours.
Dont forget to take your kids along for this rollercoaster ride.

2005-12-16T01:36:00.000+05:30

A New Beginning...

I woke up at 6.30am. Finished my morning ablutions faster than usual. I got dressed and 2 bread omlettes later, I was pulling the choke, kickstarting my bike. *kick* ,*splutter*, *kick*, *splutter*.

I'm not a morning person. But today was not just another morning.

*kick* ,*splutter*, *kick*, *ROAR*!

My bike finally gave in and thus began a wondrous journey of around 50 minutes which would've taken me 20 minutes, 3 years ago. Hell, anywhere in Bangalore was 20 minutes or less from where I stay. That was then, now I'm speeeding away at 30km/h, calling upon the services of my disc brakes every 10 feet. Okay, 8:30am - 9.30am is really not a good time to be on the roads. Especially when 3 or more schools are located on route.

Do you drive a car to work? Ever notice those annoying bikes which can easily find their way out on footpaths, under the barriers at the railway-crossings, charting new routes through a maze of vehicles, all while you're still stuck? Well, I'm on one of those bikes and you can keep honking from behind that garbage truck, you're not goin anywhere.

Finally I reach my destination.

I'm at the Reception. It looked the same way it did 15 days ago, but now I'm feeling a sense of attachment towards it. Yes, starting today, I'm gonna be walking by it everyday. I no longer have to sign in the visitors book.

You need to prepare yourself for a
lot of changes when you switch jobs.

You need to unbelong from your previous company. The cafeteria is no longer on the terrace. The elevator here doesn't play music. The cubicles are blue. Its a new world. There aren't any known faces you can say "Heyyyy" to. I've gotta start again from scratch. Its a new beginnning...